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New in Theatres · March 30, 2012

Mediocrity is the theme with this week’s new releases. Moviegoers will be treated to ‘Wrath of the Titans‘. The follow-up to 2010’s sort of successful ‘Clash of the Titans‘, which was widely criticized for its poor CGI, out-right awful 3D effects and not remaining faithful enough to the 1981 original movie. Not to mention Sam Worthington is a piss-poor Perseus!

If Swords and Sandals isn’t your thing, there is always “Mirror Mirror“, a comedic take on the Snow White fairy tale. With Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen and almost no one else of any importance in the movie, things just don’t look promising. Also, the actual visuals in this movie are ugly. The costumes are hideous, the set pieces are unattractive. It just looks like a mess! In fact, the only good looking thing in the movie is Armie Hammer!

Your best best this week is to go see ‘The Hunger Games‘ again!

WRATH OF THE TITANS
Feel the Wrath.

Directing: Jonathan Liebesman
Writing: Dan Mazeau, David Johnson (screenplay, story), Greg Berlanti, (story), Beverley Cross (1981 screenplay)
Starring: Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Rosamund Pike, Ralph Fiennes

Price of Admission will get you: better 3D, better special effects, and a better hair-do for Perseus… and that is all.

Running Time · 99 min
Genre · Action / Adventure / Fantasy
Rating · PG-13

MIRROR MIRROR
One Bad Apple.

Directing: Tarsem Singh
Writing: Jacob Grimm, Wilhelm Grimm (original story), Melissa Wallack, Jason Keller (screenplay)
Starring: Lily Collins, Julia Roberts, Armie Hammer, Nathan Lane

Price of Admission will get you: a $15 version of ABC’sOnce Upon A Time’, this time with Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen and a lot of really ugly costumes. Basically you’ll be more than happy to chow down on that poison apple by the end!

Running Time · 106 min
Genre · Adventure / Comedy / Drama / Fantasy
Rating · PG

GOON
Meet Doug, The Nicest Guy You’ll Ever Fight.

Directing: Michael Dowse
Writing: Jay Baruchel, Evan Goldberg (screenplay), Adam Frattasio, Doug Smith (novel)
Starring: Seann William Scott, Jay Baruchel and Alison Pill 

Price of Admission will get you: a good ol’ fashioned Canadian hockey movie full of enough blood and violence to satisfy any moviegoer! Fuckin’ right, eh!?

Running Time · 92 min
Genre · Comedy / Sport
Rating · R


Also In Limited Release:

BULLY
Directing: Lee Hirsch
Starring: Alex, Ja’Maya, Kelby, David Long       
Genre · Documentary
Rating · NR

INTRUDERS
Directing: Juan Carlos Fresnadillo
Starring: Clive Owen, Carice van Houten, Izán Corchero, Ella Purnell
Running Time · 100 min  
Genre · Horror / Thriller
Rating · NR

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About surlygurls

We’re two SurlyGurls brought together by a love of all things awesome and an equal hate of all things which are an affront to awesomeness everywhere.

Posted on March 30, 2012, in ENTERTAINMENT, MOVIES & FILMS, NEW IN THEATRES, OPINION, WEEKEND PREVIEW and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. BLAH! Yeah, I will definitely NOT be seeing any of those movies!

  1. Pingback: Mirror Mirror | Cine

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